High school sweet hearts, Dale and Lori got to know each other in youth group and started dating in Grade 12.
“I knew even then there something about this guy that was pretty rock solid and pretty mature,” Lori recalls.
After dating for a few years, the young couple began talking about marriage. At the same time, however, Lori’s parents began going through a divorce.
“I went through a bit of an identity crisis,” Lori says. “I was unsure of all the memories I had as child and all the things we had done together. I wondered, do I still get to keep those memories?”
As a result of that experience, Lori says she developed trust issues surrounding getting married.
“I trusted Dale completely until the day we got married,” Lori reflects. “Before we got married, if there was trust that had been broken, I could just say, I’m out of here. Once you’re married, you can’t do that. When we got married, there was a turning point for me.”
Dale found himself having to prove himself to Lori, even though he had done nothing wrong.
“I remember taking Lori’s hand when we were walking and I would wiggle her ring on her finger,” says Dale. “It was a reminder that we’re in this together. It’s a commitment and we’re in this for the long haul.”
Early in their marriage, Lori worked at a doctor’s office where they would develop X-rays old school, with solutions. While she waited for the images to develop, she would sit and pray.
“God this is your son, not mine. You’ve given him to me as my husband but he’s not mine, he’s Yours,” she would say.
Lori realized she had to let go and not hold Dale so tightly.
“I had to let go and let him become the man God created him to be, and for our relationship to grow and become beautiful.”
They have now been married for 27 years.
“We’ve worked hard at it,” says Dale. “I love Lori for who she is. We are not perfect; I’m not perfect, Lori’s not perfect. But we have put effort into our marriage and now, nearly three decades later, we are a whole lot further than we were at one year, five years or 10 years. We’ve changed and grown deeper together.”
I had to let go and let him become the man God created him to be, for our relationship to grow and become beautiful.